http://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/An honest and open diary of a 30 sumthing single girl. This is it...my life as I know it.... interesting, dull, exciting, sad... the truth.en-EUMokoFeed10http://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/http://data5.blog.de/design/preview/42/a6c4d7125ab288077a458dc5076800_160x200.jpghttp://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2008/01/09/pissed_off_pessimisticand_permanently_pe~3553357/tag:girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk,2008-01-09:/2008/01/09/pissed_off_pessimisticand_permanently_pe~3553357/Wed, 09 Jan 2008 21:31:21 +0100 <p>Well this is me in NOT a good mood. Not very often im like this but today if its not one thing its another! I think i'm seriously gonna give up on men - all of them! I was jokingly thinking i'll become a nun!! but then I realised i couldn't possibly be a nun owning half of Ann Summers....so that's out! Instead i'm gonna go shopping and buy a trolleyful of multipacks of duraceell and never look at a man again! <img src="/img/smilies/icon_sad.gif" alt=":(" class="middle" border="0"></p> <p>Okay you know what happened with the guy I met don't you...well ..we got on really well and had chatted for weeks for hours on end and had gotten quite close i thought... he talked of a future together and all that... then after we get together things changed.... he just wasn't the same and i can't be doing with games. Stuff him. </p> <p>I've turned down a date from another guy tonight cos I really think i'm just going to give up <img src="/img/smilies/icon_sad.gif" alt=":(" class="middle" border="0"></p> <p>i'm so bloody stupid to believe everything a man tells me. I know I am. And i'm never gonna change so ..... why let myself be put through all this heartache over and over and over again???</p> <p>On top of that, the fires bloody broken ... again... and that being the only source of heat its bloody freezing ....and i'm broke... and a few other things...and its like ...god, kick me when i'm down why don't you.</p> <p>Fuck it im gonna run a hot bath and have a good cry I think. Nowt like a bit of self indulgence. Don't get me wrong my problems are nothing compared to a lot of people who may be homeless or ill or soomething like that, i know. I'm very much aware that i'm feeling sorry for myself. But you know what? I can't help it. </p> <p>xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx</p> <p> <small> <a href="http://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2008/01/09/pissed_off_pessimisticand_permanently_pe~3553357/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2008/01/09/pissed_off_pessimisticand_permanently_pe~3553357/#commentshttp://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2008/01/07/new_year_new_man~3543932/tag:girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk,2008-01-07:/2008/01/07/new_year_new_man~3543932/Mon, 07 Jan 2008 23:29:11 +0100 <p>Hi all ....sorry i don't write every day, i just write when i feel like talking if you know what i mean <img src="/img/smilies/icon_smile.gif" alt=":)" class="middle" border="0"> besides, you would be bored stiff having to read my rantings and ravings every day!! lol ... so i come here sometimes every day, sometimes every 2 or 3 days ..... some of my friends write a few blogs a day...i'm not that interesting i'm afraid! <img src="/img/smilies/icon_smile.gif" alt=":)" class="middle" border="0"> xxxxxxxxx</p> <p>well..... i can "officially" say i've got a ...oh my god...dare I say it...BOYFRIEND.... lol.... however .... as usual with me and as much as you would expect from me by now i'm sure..... i'm all mixed up and not sure whats happening!!!! we got together - its the man i met online by the way <img src="/img/smilies/icon_smile.gif" alt=":)" class="middle" border="0"> ...... we got together, had a fantastic time, lots of laughs, cuddles (and yes, i admit we had sex....i was going to wait but it just felt right so why not....4 times in less than 24 hours!Ace!)... and we hugged as we said bye and talked of stuff we will do in the future etc.... and we text and email and stuff every day... he's got a lot on his plate at the moment ...... but still, he doesn't say I miss you as smuch as I say it and i KNOW women can be a nightmare and i'm never happy!!!! but seriously.... so after talking to my friend about it she suggested i play it a bit cooler... more friends than anything and see how he responds... not too cool but not too over the top either.</p> <p>Men. I'll never understand any of you.</p> <p>we haven't even arranged the next date yet <img src="/img/smilies/icon_sad.gif" alt=":(" class="middle" border="0"> am I an idiot???? </p> <p>thinking how this must sound to you, i would say a big definite HELL YES WOMAN CAN'T YOU SEE WHAT A TIT YOU ARE???!!! </p> <p>but he IS a genuine guy. And we've chatted today... just chit chat...anyway i'm off to bed.... sad and wanting to cry <img src="/img/smilies/icon_sad.gif" alt=":(" class="middle" border="0"> oh god i'm sooooo fed up!!!! think i'm gonna join the nunnery!!!!!! black is SOOOO my colour too!!!!</p> <p>xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2008/01/07/new_year_new_man~3543932/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2008/01/07/new_year_new_man~3543932/#commentshttp://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/31/happy_new_year_alone_again~3511250/tag:girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk,2007-12-31:/2007/12/31/happy_new_year_alone_again~3511250/Mon, 31 Dec 2007 15:12:02 +0100 <p>Well let me first start off by wishing everyone a happy new year - hope you all had a great christmas. </p> <p>What's everyone up to tonight? I'm going to be out partying with my friends. It will be fun - wish I had that somebody special to kiss at midnight - but not this year.</p> <p>I feel quite a lot sad about that actually. My love life is as much all over the place as ever - if not more so! God, i'm doing my OWN head in!!! ha ha ha </p> <p>Where did we get up to the last time we spoke? Lets see - I think I was telling you about the guy I've known for years asking me on a date.... we've not been on it yet... he rang the other day but I "missed" his call - want to make him work a bit for it <img src="/img/smilies/icon_smile.gif" alt=":)" class="middle" border="0"> I'm worth chasing you know! <img src="/img/smilies/icon_smile.gif" alt=":)" class="middle" border="0"> ha ha ha I texted him the next day just saying hope he's okay and has a great new year. We'll see what happens with that one.... I have a feeling it'll go on for another few years before we actually go out for the date! </p> <p>I'm sure I told you about how excited I was about meeting a guy that i've been texting with for ages and he was meant to be coming over and we were going to have a great fun day doing fun stuff, we coulda just ended up as friends, like we were already, we were just open to it being more, were going to see how we felt .... well problems arose - I was on tenterhooks all day.... it wasn't his fault he couldn't make it, problems arose which he had to deal with - it couldn't be helped I know - but I was disappointed when he didn't drive over in the late afternoon after the problem had been sorted - so much for the text saying that he would walk to see me if he had to! Hah! </p> <p>We are going to rearrange. We will see what happens.</p> <p>Subsequently, downhearted, sad and feeling rejected, when an old flame texted, whom I am still friends with, invited me over for the evening I went. I tried not to let anything happen but I thought...hell ... why not? I'm still single!!!!!! He's single!!!!!!!! what the hell!!!! So, after quite a lot of hours of flirting, laughing and cuddling up chatting, his hand moved slowly nearer to my breast... by the time he had ever so softly and slowly moved his hand inside my lacy top my breasts were heaving, I could hardly breathe and every nerve in my body was tingling ...... we were both breathing hard as his fingers slid inside my top, rubbing my nipple. He was hard as rock too. We stayed at this level of excitement not doing much else fora while.... me trying to work out in my head should I be doing this.... and finally I mentioned it and that I didn't want it to ruin our friendship and didn't want to just have a relationship based on sex..... he was honest with me too and said he had missed me, had thought how great it would be to have me over to spend time with him and that's it.... I like honesty.... He didn't lead me on.... I knew it was gonna be just sex.... I fought with myself about this, I really did. But like I say, in the end I thought well i'm single and i'm hot for him so why not??? so when his hand moved to unbotton my jeans I didn't stop him. My fingers flew to his buttons and I undid him and within seconds his jeans were off and he was sprung up proud and HUGE in front of me!... god this man is BIG I tell you! In fact its so big I can only handle doggy style for a few minutes before it hurts too much... dammit!!! ha ha ha .... anyway we moved into the bedroom and had amazing sex..... our bodies were sweaty and hot and we cuddled after. He kept checking I was okay. I was. And that's how we left it... we cuddled for a bit after and kissed each other bye and we texted goodnight and thats it. I dunno if this will happen again ever .... I don't want a relationship just based on sex though... I don't regret what I did, it was what I needed. But if i'm ever actually dating somebody that's it... loyalty is my middle name and I swear that no matter who it is or what has happened, if i'm with a guy in a relationship I wouldn't so much as kiss anybody else. </p> <p>You see, I'm a nice girl with a big heart.... and i'm turning this way and that and yes, I have these dates lined up... did I tell you another guy is texting asking me to dinner.... I haven't said yes yet... and I'm meant to be going on another date soon with somebody else.... I can't decide if i'm going to go yet..... then there's this guy that i've known for years .... (see above!)...... and then there's this other guy that we are friends but who knows... and who couldn't make it as arranged...</p> <p>I may have dates..... but I feel like i'm wandering alone in a big dense forest and i'm lost..... </p> <p>Anyway - my curlers are heating up and I need to do my hair ready for partying tonight with my friends! <img src="/img/smilies/icon_smile.gif" alt=":)" class="middle" border="0"> Hope everyone has a great New Year xxxxxxxx </p> <p>PS any advice would be gratefully received! <img src="/img/smilies/icon_smile.gif" alt=":)" class="middle" border="0"> thank you! <img src="/img/smilies/icon_smile.gif" alt=":)" class="middle" border="0"> xxxxx hugs xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/31/happy_new_year_alone_again~3511250/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/31/happy_new_year_alone_again~3511250/#commentshttp://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/26/merry_christmas~3493439/tag:girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk,2007-12-26:/2007/12/26/merry_christmas~3493439/Wed, 26 Dec 2007 21:11:31 +0100 <p>Hi all.... hope everybody had a lovely xmas day yesterday, I did, it was fab! <img src="/img/smilies/icon_smile.gif" alt=":)" class="middle" border="0"> Caught up with family and it was great to see everyone.</p> <p>Today is Boxing Day and that's nearly over also - where did Xmas go???!!! </p> <p>Not long now til I meet my soulmate - did I tell you we had arranged to meet? This weekend!!! I can't wait!!! we've spent hours texting each other and missing each other and eventually we will get to have a real kiss.... I can't wait.</p> <p>Merry christmas ! :0) xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/26/merry_christmas~3493439/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/26/merry_christmas~3493439/#commentshttp://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/21/texting_guy~3472565/tag:girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk,2007-12-20:/2007/12/21/texting_guy~3472565/Fri, 21 Dec 2007 00:44:13 +0100 <p>wow....is all i can say..... talk about being blown away and swept off your feet.....he seems amazing....I can't wait til we actually meet for real.... </p> <p>Hope I'm not setting myself up for more pain and heartache here....</p> <p>I know you have to take chances in life though.... and maybe this chance is worth it?? <img src="/img/smilies/icon_smile.gif" alt=":)" class="middle" border="0"> xxxxxxxxx </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/21/texting_guy~3472565/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/21/texting_guy~3472565/#commentshttp://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/20/dates~3470563/tag:girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk,2007-12-20:/2007/12/20/dates~3470563/Thu, 20 Dec 2007 16:48:52 +0100 <p>Well as you know, i'm meant to be meeting this guy i've known for a few years for a date soon.... I said after new year, he said this week if possible.... I haven't texted him and he hasn't texted me....I could do but I feel that he should make more of an effort if he wants to take me out, don't you agree??? He asked me to text him during the week - well today is Thursday and he hasn't texted ME! .... i'll leave it til weekend then maybe I will text to say hello....</p> <p>In the meantime..... I've "met" a guy "online".....and am quite into him actually! We are constantly texting and he says the most lovely things.... we can't wait to meet up.......</p> <p>I am trying to be good with the "man at work" and not encourage him at all ..... lets see if we can keep that up!</p> <p>I have another guy I'm meant to be meeting for a date in January too.......</p> <p>Men are like busses!!!! You don't get one for ages and then 3 come along at once!!!! lol <img src="/img/smilies/icon_smile.gif" alt=":)" class="middle" border="0"> </p> <p>well, we will see what happens..... I'm trying to keep open minded and not expect too much.... although the guy i'm texting all the time is on my mind a lot <img src="/img/smilies/icon_smile.gif" alt=":)" class="middle" border="0"> and i'm on his apparently <img src="/img/smilies/icon_smile.gif" alt=":)" class="middle" border="0"> awwwwww</p> <p>Am I naieve? Maybe....but if you don't take a chance now and then you may never meet the one..... xxxxx </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/20/dates~3470563/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/20/dates~3470563/#commentshttp://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/18/broken_heart~3462128/tag:girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk,2007-12-18:/2007/12/18/broken_heart~3462128/Tue, 18 Dec 2007 20:54:03 +0100 <p>You know, somebody asked me today if I "was over" my last b/f....the only one I let live with me in 8 years...and who talked of ever after etc etc... and then cheated on me... so I threw him out.... Am I over him? Good question....</p> <p>a) would i ever have him back? </p> <p>Answer - No, not ever, not in a million years, not in this lifetime or any other lifetime, not if you paid me a million pounds.</p> <p>b) Does it still hurt?</p> <p>Yes</p> <p>c) Do I still love him? </p> <p>Not in a good way. When I love sombody, really realy love somebody, I give all that I have and am - every cell in my body and all my soul. I believe that when you love somebody that deeply, and they break your heart, that a piece of your heart breaks off and stays broken off forever. You can love again, maybe even more deeply than before, but that tiny piece of your heart will always be broken.</p> <p>xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/18/broken_heart~3462128/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/18/broken_heart~3462128/#commentshttp://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/17/merry_monday~3457379/tag:girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk,2007-12-17:/2007/12/17/merry_monday~3457379/Mon, 17 Dec 2007 20:51:46 +0100 <p>Saw Man At Work today and, as usual, my stomach flipped when he looked and smiled at me.... I recently told him during one of our flrting moments, what little phrase turns me into jelly.... mistake? maybe..lol....coz as soon as I saw him this morning he mentioned these little words to me and I nearly ran over and kissed him there and then....!! But of course I didn't... coz i'm a good girl! <img src="/img/smilies/icon_smile.gif" alt=":)" class="middle" border="0"></p> <p>The dress I wore today lets me get away without wearing a bra, which I hate wearing by the way, and it was so cold after I had been outside that my nipples were clearly erect through the material of the dress .... and his eyes were drawn there immediately... I wanted so much to feel his hands sliding under my dress, stroking my soft breasts, rubbing my nipples.... kissing me..... God....Its hard being a good girl!!!!!! Especially when you think about sex every minute of the day like I do!!!</p> <p>Imagining his hands on me...his lips caressing my skin.... I squirmed at my desk as I tried to concentrate on my work.... wow....the anticipation and not being able to do anything about it....is a killer! xxxxx </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/17/merry_monday~3457379/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/17/merry_monday~3457379/#commentshttp://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/16/maybe_not_so_pessimistic_after_all~3451955/tag:girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk,2007-12-16:/2007/12/16/maybe_not_so_pessimistic_after_all~3451955/Sun, 16 Dec 2007 18:24:38 +0100 <p>Well..... he's just rang again... asking if he can see me before Christmas....one evening to fit in with me, maybe this week....</p> <p>I'm pleasantly surprised....</p> <p>We'll see what happens...............xxxxxxxx </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/16/maybe_not_so_pessimistic_after_all~3451955/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/16/maybe_not_so_pessimistic_after_all~3451955/#commentshttp://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/16/a_date~3451931/tag:girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk,2007-12-16:/2007/12/16/a_date~3451931/Sun, 16 Dec 2007 18:18:40 +0100 <p>Well.... would you believe it, that guy who has been texting all day has actually asked me out... we've known each other for a couple of years and have flirted ..... he was texting nice stuff and then it got a bit dirty ... so i texted him "forget it".... and he rang me immediately saying he was only messing with me, course he'd like to see me properly and when? so we are going on a "date" ...i've told him after xmas holidays are over though.... </p> <p>yeah right, okay, we'll see what happens...</p> <p>See...you men have made me pessimistic .......</p> <p>xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/16/a_date~3451931/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/16/a_date~3451931/#commentshttp://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/16/reflective_mood~3450903/tag:girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk,2007-12-16:/2007/12/16/reflective_mood~3450903/Sun, 16 Dec 2007 13:52:27 +0100 <p>Yes today I'm in a "What the hell do men want!" reflective mood!!!! lol...i've just had a 19 year old texting me - he's very very fit and we have kissed before and he wants to take it further.... he is rather young though.... but it is very flattering...Also had a text from another guy who is flirting with me..... but these guys i'm sure are only after one thing..... now don't call me a prude....after all you should know me by now - i'm no prude! In fact it bloody annoys me how guys can have as much sex as they want and be cool and us girls would get a rep if we slept with everyone we wanted to and had chance to!! Don't even get me started on it!! And also, whilst we're on the subject, I just don't get why it is that girls can say "no sex for you for a while boyo!"... as if its only the man who wants sex all the time! I would find that torture myself! Am I in the minority of women who absolutely love sex and can't get enough of it???</p> <p>Anyway, where was I? Oh yeah, so these guys only want sex i'm guessing....and as much as I love sex (see above!! lol)... I want more ... I want lots of sex AND lots of cuddles and love with it....</p> <p>Am I asking too much?? I'm starting to feel like I am....!!<br> xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/16/reflective_mood~3450903/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/16/reflective_mood~3450903/#commentshttp://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/15/phone_sex~3447612/tag:girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk,2007-12-15:/2007/12/15/phone_sex~3447612/Sat, 15 Dec 2007 16:55:02 +0100 <p>Well the week at work has been titillating as usual with me and him.... teasing each other...flirting, little touches, saying what we want to do with each other with our eyes, lips being licked, bodies leaning close towards one another when seemingly talking of everyday things.... wow.... then last night we msn'd each other and got each other into a frenzy... i had my my hand inside my panties as he typed what he would do to me if we ever did get it on..... he had a hard on and wanted to bend me over and fuck me right and then.... i just wish we could have done! ... then he rang me... waited til I was in bed and wanted saucy pics... i took a few and sent them him... close up of my smooth big breast, nipple hard and erect...amongst others.... i had my toys layed out next to me and he talked dirty to me as the ears of my rabbit vibrated hard against my clit making me moan... I held the phone against my ear with my shoulder as with one hand I used my rabbit and with the other inserted another favourite toy, a long smooth pink vibro inside me... he wanted to hear me cum.... it didn't take long.... wow.....</p> <p>I've had phone sex before, a long time ago, and it didn't really do much for me to be honest... but this was hot.... we talked of meeting for real.... both of us want it soooo badly.... </p> <p>we will see what happens.................</p> <p> <small> <a href="http://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/15/phone_sex~3447612/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/15/phone_sex~3447612/#commentshttp://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/13/dick~3439691/tag:girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk,2007-12-13:/2007/12/13/dick~3439691/Thu, 13 Dec 2007 20:35:53 +0100 <p>yes thats right...Dick...could do with some of that right now! Hot and horny and manless!!!! could contact FB.... could contact ex (who wants me to relocate)... FB is fine for just that...fucking..... the ex would complicate things....I would want good sex and cuddles..... not necessarily moving house though.... !!! God why is life complicated!!! Where's a good man when you need a good fuck?!</p> <p>xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/13/dick~3439691/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/13/dick~3439691/#commentshttp://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/12/ex_boyfriends_ex_for_a_reason~3434519/tag:girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk,2007-12-12:/2007/12/12/ex_boyfriends_ex_for_a_reason~3434519/Wed, 12 Dec 2007 20:46:43 +0100 <p>Well you know i told you about the ex who was asking about me relocating etc etc and i've been thinking about it even more... yes I think i've definitely decided to see what he says if I asked HIM to relocate - that seems the best idea don't you think? Then i'd really get to know what he feels for me....If he's changed at all.... </p> <p>maybe i'm just destined to always be on my own? Maybe.... and if that's so then so be it. I mean, its not like i'm desperate to have ANYONE...i've rejected a lot of the guys i've gone out with for one reason or another - don't get me wrong, not for silly reasons - but if i've felt it just isn't working, or that i'm doing all the giving and not receiving enough time etc off them... or if, like the last major b/f in my life, he cheats... then i won't settle.... I have always said I won't settle and I'm not about to start now. It has to be true love with trust, loyalty and mutual respect. I don't think that's too much to ask for is it? </p> <p>You know how certain songs bring back memories straight away of a specific time and usually, a specific boyfriend...? well a very specific song came on the radio this morning whilst I was in the car and I dared myself to look at pics i've moved off my phone onto my memory card (so as not to accidentally look at them)... of my ex.... it still hurt...it cut like a knife actually... and that was many months ago - but i don't regret telling him to get his stuff and go.... It very nearly killed me breaking up with him but I won't settle for a relationship with a man knowing he is cheating on me - after all, that's not even really a relationship anyway is it? He had seemed surprised when I told him to get his stuff and leave - obviously he underestimated me. </p> <p>Im still trying desperately to be good where the man at work is concerned - despite constant flirting and egging on from him... i'm being strong and being a good girl. </p> <p>Damn its hard though. Somestime life as a bitch seems highly wonderful and I think I should try it....if only I could! </p> <p>Anyhow i've wittered on enough on here for now me thinks! ha ha ... </p> <p>Cia for now xxxxxxxxxxxxxx</p> <p> <small> <a href="http://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/12/ex_boyfriends_ex_for_a_reason~3434519/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/12/ex_boyfriends_ex_for_a_reason~3434519/#commentshttp://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/11/cuddles~3430235/tag:girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk,2007-12-11:/2007/12/11/cuddles~3430235/Tue, 11 Dec 2007 23:01:18 +0100 <p>One of the downsides of being a singledon is the lack of cuddles.... it is really sad for someone who adores being cuddled and cuddling as much as I do not to have arms around me at night to cuddle up to... our naked bodies entwined as we slip into slumberland....their breath gently fanning my cheek as we doze.... yeah .... I miss it xxxxxxxxx </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/11/cuddles~3430235/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/11/cuddles~3430235/#commentshttp://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/10/fb~3424161/tag:girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk,2007-12-10:/2007/12/10/fb~3424161/Mon, 10 Dec 2007 20:17:38 +0100 <p>Well last night I bumped into my FB....we never let on to anyone else, our mutual friends etc, that we are FB's... that we have a "kind of" relationship.... it just seems to mutually work for us both - I don't think either of us want a proper relationship..... I was therefore a little surprised when, in front of our friends, his hand would rest on my bum and he would lean in close to me and leave little kisses on my neck.... it was a pleasant suprise mind... but i'm still not under any illusions... he was making it clear to me that he wanted us to have a session later.... but I had work to go to today, he lives in another town nearby and so it wasn't going to happen, even though I would have liked it to. Still, I did wink at him and ask him what he's up to wednesday!.... ha ha ha .... we'll see..... I wonder if Wednesday will be FB night.... </p> <p>In the meantime I've got an ex b/f keep texting me serious relationship questions...what would I do about this... would I move and relocate... questions about the future.... i've told him yes I would relocate etc ... now i'm not so sure... isn't this, after all, what happened previously and what in the end made me finish it? Cos I was doing all the giving.... giving up my place, moving from my friends and many other things... if this is meant to be then i've decided it HAS to be different from last time. We will see what happens...watch this space....!!</p> <p>xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/10/fb~3424161/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/10/fb~3424161/#commentshttp://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/09/later~3418955/tag:girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk,2007-12-09:/2007/12/09/later~3418955/Sun, 09 Dec 2007 19:34:35 +0100 <p>well, by the time i'd come out of the shower, dripping with water I was also feeling so wet that I thought I would burst! Laying out my selection of toys I scrabbled round the bedroom searching desperately for more batteries as the ones in the toys appeared to have run down...I wonder why that is??!!! ..... finding a few I managed to bring myself to wonderful orgasm 8 times in 10 minutes and settled for that... I find that I also love my arse being tantalised at the same time as my clit and wow.... yes ... 8 lovely orgasms later I'm feeling able to breathe again!!!!</p> <p>Thank god for Ann Summers is all I can say!!!!!!xxxxxxxxxxxxx </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/09/later~3418955/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/09/later~3418955/#commentshttp://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/09/wet_and_frisky~3418497/tag:girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk,2007-12-09:/2007/12/09/wet_and_frisky~3418497/Sun, 09 Dec 2007 18:02:18 +0100 <p>You join me just as i'm about to go up to my shower... I have to you see.... i've just been imagining what i'd like to be done to me right now and now i'm fucking horny.....</p> <p>I'll share it with you.....</p> <p>His lips would leave gentle butterfly kisses at the base of my naked back... slowly, teasingly moving upwards...making me shiver with anticipation... my breathing would quicken as his lips brushed against my bare shoulder, moving slowly around to my neck... near my earlobe, along my jawline...his hands would roughly grab a handful of my long blonde hair, pulling my head roughly backwards as his kisses neared my parted lips... teasing me with the tip of his tongue.... my naked breasts heaving and rising, the nipples erect and hard.. with one hand holding tightly onto a handful of my hair, his other hand would come round and cup my smooth breast, his thumb rubbing the nipple hard, his lips and tongue forcing my mouth open even more, his hand pulling my hair even harder as he forces his tongue into my wet open mouth making me gasp as he pushes himself against me harder...</p> <p>I feel his erection straining against his jeans and rub along the length of his hardness making him moan... I unzip his jeans and my hand slips around his hot throbbing cock, releasing him from the confines of his jeans.... his erect cock stiff and hard in my hand... I gently slide my hand up and down its length and suddenly I push him back and lean down to lick the tip of his cock whilst my hand is still hard around the base... my lips brush against his balls making him groan and I take a ball in my mouth and move my tongue rapidly over its softness....moving it around in my hot wet mouth.... </p> <p>God i have to go now............. HOT SOAPY SHOWER IS CALLING ME.... soapy suds.... hot water cascading over my naked body... my hands squeezing my breasts....</p> <p>Yep gotta go......xxxxxxxxx </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/09/wet_and_frisky~3418497/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/09/wet_and_frisky~3418497/#commentshttp://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/08/where_for_art_thou_romeo_come_hither~3415256/tag:girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk,2007-12-08:/2007/12/08/where_for_art_thou_romeo_come_hither~3415256/Sat, 08 Dec 2007 22:14:22 +0100 <p>Hello hello hello..... no i'm not a policeman.... but if I was i'd certainly know what to do with that trunction! ha ha ha .... well, last time I "got any" was a few days ago and i'm hot and horny minutes later, never mind days later! But, despite what you may think after reading my blog and deciding i'm a sex starved maniac .... ha ha ha ...its also love i'm looking for...i wanna be this hot and horny all the time still but with MY man!! Trouble is.... where is he??!!!! ha ha ha ha .... </p> <p>A bit random this... but you know when you see something that you just can't help but laugh at even though you know you shouldn't really? Well i was driving back from my friends (after getting lost numerous times!) and as I was driving along I saw a man...well i saw the bottom part of a man walking along blindly with at least 4 big sofa cushions in his arms... and he walked straight into the lamp post in front of him!! ha ha ha ha ..... i nearly crashed I was laughing so much. It was a classic! </p> <p>You know, I was visiting a friend last night and she had some of her other mates over too and it was a bril night, loads of giggling and silly dancing and acting daft... and the girls are all very pretty, one girl in particular is stunning and yet, she finds it hard to find a fella! I just don't get it! You men - what did they teach you on Mars??!!!</p> <p>I just got another text off an ex b/f who is from years ago but we still keep in touch... we are talking of getting back together ... eventually.... Is it wise though I ask myself? aren't they an ex for a reason??? Maybe though, after all these years, we've both learnt to appreciate each other more and have learnt whats important... ?</p> <p>Who konws? Maybe we will get to meet again soon and find out instead of keep talking about it.</p> <p>Anyhow...due to lack of sex for me tonight....I have treated myself to some yummy Maltesers.... something good to roll around in my mouth.... ha ha .... I am now going to enjoy whilst watching the results of X Factor.... Yes...i know...its Saturday night and i'm in.... boring? no... just bloody broke!!! ha ha ha </p> <p>Party on People xxxxxxxxxx </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/08/where_for_art_thou_romeo_come_hither~3415256/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/08/where_for_art_thou_romeo_come_hither~3415256/#commentshttp://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/06/in_need_of_chocoate~3406243/tag:girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk,2007-12-06:/2007/12/06/in_need_of_chocoate~3406243/Thu, 06 Dec 2007 21:46:04 +0100 <p>well they say chocolate is nearly as good as sex don't they??! well... i would have to disagree... but the fact that I have no man handcuffed to my bed railings at this moment means chocolate seems to be my only alternative... but i'm trying to be good and not give in to the temptation! ha ha ha </p> <p>Although last night I certainly gave into temptation didn't I? That was good and I need more.... but we aren't in a relationship as such .... and I don't actually want a relationship, exactly, with FB anyway, just sex. It's just that I need it ALL the time.... "sigh"....WHERE is there a man for me that can keep up??!!!!!! </p> <p>There's a guy at work that has me hot all day...and I know I have him hot all day as well...cos i've often felt the bulge in his tight trousers of his suit..... he loves it...and so do I!.... but he's not available and I keep trying to stop our filthy texts and smouldering looks .....but you know when you have that connection?? That sizzle?? It just won't go away!!!!</p> <p>I have strong principals about marriage, relationships and loyalty. I was married for a decade and I never once cheated...although I know my then husband did... and in every single relationship i've ever been in I can honestly say I've never ever cheated... not even so much as a kiss.... that's how much I believe in it... this guy though....god, I am wet as soon as I look at him! I feel myself tingling and I watch his lips as he talks imagining them on mine, kissing my neck, licking my erect nipples.... he feels exactly the same...we keep trying desperately to ignore it....</p> <p>Then the other day I just suggested we should just do it...get it out of the way... once it's done and we've got what we wanted... maybe then it would disappear and we wouldn't be tempted anymore and driving each other insane! I just don't know what to do....he's a friend too, not a close one but a friend. We get on really well. But I wonder if i'd just be setting myself up again for MORE heartache if I gave in... and I totally disagree with it anyway...so again I resist and keep being a good girl.</p> <p>Today I was so horny at work and I kept putting the beads I was wearing into my mouth, swirling them around with my tongue... it drove me even more insane!.... FB last night really really LOVES my BJ's.... i think it makes all the difference in the world if you really love to do it... and I do.... I enjoy it.... and that's why it's so good.</p> <p>Anyway, i'm sitting here typing this and biting my lip and my nipples are getting all hard again so i'm going to have to go.... hot bubble bath calls me then a fun time in bed with my toys me thinks.... well... a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do....hasn't she?!</p> <p>xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/06/in_need_of_chocoate~3406243/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/06/in_need_of_chocoate~3406243/#commentshttp://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/06/lost~3401689/tag:girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk,2007-12-05:/2007/12/06/lost~3401689/Thu, 06 Dec 2007 00:03:05 +0100 <p>Hi again...well...so much for me getting out my toys and being a good girl... I decided I needed some TLC so texted this guy that I see every now and again, we just have sex, so I suppose he's what you would call my Fuck Buddy... but its not like we meet weekly or anything...just when it suits us both and the time feels right...and of course when neither of us are in a relationship... anyway, texted him and he came and got me and we "gonna watch a film"...We even got so far as putting the DVD into thd DVD player... but before we'd even pressed start we were half undressed on the couch... I suggested we head upstairs which we did quickly and had some pretty damn good sex I have to say! Well, more brilliant foreplay than anything else but it was JUST what I needed...!!! Two orgasms later and I felt a bit sated, ready to be taken back home... the guy wanted to go again...normally I would too...but my head is all mixed up cos of the mixed up fella I'd recently been seeing and was now over. </p> <p>Whilst I was stood waiting for my FB (Fuck Buddy) to come pick me up I was pondering why I was doing this...After all, I was gutted about the b/f.... so why the hell was I doing this?? </p> <p>Then it hit me.... not only did I need a bit of TLC... I also needed to feel desired... wanted... that I'm attractive and sexy... and although I may feel empty afterwards (cos at the heart of all this I am, believe it or not, a very nice girl), it was what I needed at that moment. So I went ahead with it and it was great. I'm home now. I've left him wanting more.... (he was plenty satisfied believe me... but wanted more <img src="/img/smilies/icon_smile.gif" alt=":)" class="middle" border="0">!) but I felt, like I had known it was what I needed at that time to go to be with him, I felt it was right that I was back home. After all, this guy and me, my FB, have never actually been on a date, we just end up shagging each other sometimes. We are friends and respect each other but that's as far as our relationship will ever go, bar the sex. </p> <p>We left it that we might meet up again at the weekend though..... <img src="/img/smilies/icon_smile.gif" alt=":)" class="middle" border="0"> that would be fun.... </p> <p>I seriously have to think about where my head is at at the moment though - I mean yeah, I need sex.... not just want it but NEED it!! but I also need the loving arms around me all night and little kisses and the murmuring of sweet nothings in my ear....dozily kissing each other as we fall asleep in each others arms... not with FB... don't get me wrong.... but with SOMEBODY.... and not just anybody...it has to be right.... but where the hell is HE??!!! </p> <p>Answers on a postcard please........!!!</p> <p>Ta ta for now........</p> <p>Confused but reasonably satisfied, lonely, mixed up girl! Nite nite xxx </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/06/lost~3401689/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/06/lost~3401689/#commentshttp://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/05/hometime_yet~3399657/tag:girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk,2007-12-05:/2007/12/05/hometime_yet~3399657/Wed, 05 Dec 2007 17:26:18 +0100 <p>Back again....horny as ever and cannot WAIT to get home, run a hot bubble bath and get out my selection of toys from Ann Summers ...oh yay.... would prefer a real man right now .. and could ring up a couple whom i'm sure would "assist".... but as horny as i am, its got to be with the right person... so no man for me then.... cos i have NO man in my life at the moment!!!!</p> <p>As you can see, i'm finding this a major thing in my life at present, its not normally such a big deal but i've had a realisation as of yesterday and am single again and feel let down and stupid and am even more sceptical of men.... saying that I bet I'd still believe every line they tell me... typically blonde I am!</p> <p>Where oh where is the man of my dreams???!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (with a LOT of stamina!) <img src="/img/smilies/icon_smile.gif" alt=":)" class="middle" border="0"> xxxx </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/05/hometime_yet~3399657/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/05/hometime_yet~3399657/#commentshttp://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/05/fucking_horny~3398860/tag:girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk,2007-12-05:/2007/12/05/fucking_horny~3398860/Wed, 05 Dec 2007 14:01:59 +0100 <p>Hi again.... well i'm at work...at my desk...and should be working.... all that I can think about though is SEX SEX SEX!!!!! what is a girl to do????!!!</p> <p>AND I don't even have a fella now that I can man-handle, to give me a good seeing-to! God talk about frustration!!!!</p> <p>xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/05/fucking_horny~3398860/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>http://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/05/fucking_horny~3398860/#commentshttp://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/04/men_i_ll_never_understand_them_in_a_mill~3396225/tag:girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk,2007-12-04:/2007/12/04/men_i_ll_never_understand_them_in_a_mill~3396225/Tue, 04 Dec 2007 22:23:35 +0100 <p>Hi and welcome to my first ever blog....it's a funny word isn't it...blog...i'm basically going to use this as my online diary - if nobody else reads it then that's fine, at least I can use it to look back on ...laugh...cry.... maybe learn from my mistakes!!! Then again, part of me believes that you should never regret what happens in your life as everything that happens makes you the person you are today - the bad things included! So take the rough with the smooth, put it all down to experience and learn from it....</p> <p>Yeah that's all very good and well apart from when you're in the middle of it and all you wanna do is hit the wine bottle and have that bar of chocolate you've denied yourself all week!</p> <p>I mean,WHAT is it that men want???!!!!! What exactly??? I mean apart from the obvious .... AND by the way it isn't just men that want THAT all the time either.... i've been called a Nymphomaniac by 2 previous boyfriends.... as if it was a problem or sumthing!!! Is it???!!! WOULD a guy be unhappy with a girlfriend who wanted to get jiggy at every opportunity?? </p> <p>I'm in my thirties and I still don't get men...maybe I never will.... Let me describe myself a bit for you... </p> <p>Dizzy is my middle name! ha ha yep, that's me.I've got long blonde hair, blue eyes, an average figure (ie not fat but not kate moss either!)... have been told i'm stunning, I love having a laugh and a giggle, have millions of good friends, am loving, loyal, affectionate, honest, warm and loveable. So WHY am I still single???!!!!! Huh???!!!! Men..!!!!</p> <p>Take this last boyfriend I decided to date, to give it a try.... he tells me he wants me to be his "partner" and then when I text him that i'm missing him, he says its too heavy...!!!... then he states that although i'm great, the sex is great, the cuddles are great...blah blah blah.... he could see us being together for a long time but not forever .. and thats what he wants.... sorry if he's mucked me about...</p> <p>MUCKED ME ABOUT???!!! talk about confusing a girl!!!! </p> <p>I find myself gutted, I feel made a fool of for letting myself believe him when he fed me all what must have been lies about the nice things he had said to me.... </p> <p>see fellas..... you go and do this to a girl...then wonder why we are the way we are.</p> <p>Help!!! Tips gratefully received!!!!!!!!!!!!!!</p> <p>Right i'm logging off now....</p> <p>Ta ta for now xxxxxxx </p> <p> <small> <a href="http://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/04/men_i_ll_never_understand_them_in_a_mill~3396225/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>relationshipslovehttp://Girllookingforlove.blog.co.uk/2007/12/04/men_i_ll_never_understand_them_in_a_mill~3396225/#comments